What do Dracula's girlfriend and a washed up boxer have in common?
They both go down for the count!
How do you paralyze a woman from the waist down?
Marry her.
What's the difference between love and herpes?
Love doesn't last forever.
Girl texts: "If you're sleeping, send your dreams ... if you're laughing, send your smile."
Boyfriend texts back: "Taking a shit... Please advise."
