Hookers Or Bungee Jumping

What does bungee jumping & a hooker have in common?

Cost: a 100 bucks. If the rubber breaks you're screwed.

Gal tells her friend, "I just read it's against the law to go topless in the New York subway."

Her friend says, "Thank God. It's bad enough when you catch your scarf in those doors."

My wife suggested: "Let’s go out and have some fun tonight!"

So I told her: "Sure... but if you get home before I do, leave the hall light on."

And that's when the fight started...

You know what happens when you stop believing in Santa Claus?

You start getting clothes for Christmas.