Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?
Because the snowblower was coming down the block.
How do you know when your cat's done cleaning himself?
He's smoking a cigarette.
My wife and I were talking anatomy. She asked if I agreed that the body is a wonderful, perfect machine. I told her a woman's body has one purpose. She asked what?
I told her life support for her pussy.
And that's when the fight started...
My wife and I were talking about the differences between little boys and little girls. I asked her: "Why don't little girls fart like little boys do?"
She answered: "Because they don't get assholes until they're married."
