What do you call a hooker with a runny nose?
Full.
I told my wife our credit cards were stolen, but I'm not reporting it.
She asked why not?
"Cause the thief spends less than you do."
And that's when the fight started...
My wife was concerned that we weren't managing the household well in tough financial times. So she asked me to take some action and plan for the future.
No problem I told her. I ran out and came home with 2 cases of beer instead of one.
Why do men like women with small hands?
It makes their dicks look bigger.
