It's So Cute...

A blonde goes to the gynecologist, and he examines her.

He says, "You have acute vaginitis."

She says, "Thank you..."

My wife wanted to be a little adventurous. She told me she was up for making a sex tape.

I said, "Great, we should hold auditions for your part."

And that's when the fight started...

What did the fresh egg say to the boiling water when the farmer's wife dropped it in?

Don't expect me to get hard so fast... I just got laid by some chick a minute ago.

Why were the two whores travelling in London pissed off?

Because they found out that Big Ben was a clock!