What's the difference between a penis and a bonus?
Your wife will always blow your bonus!
What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.
(Hope that one wasn't too bad!)
The local pharmacy was robbed of 100 bottles of Viagra. Clearly the work of a hardened criminal.
A guy woke up one day on Valentines day, he went to check the mail and saw there were no cards. He thought to himself, "Must be because there's no post on a Sunday..."
"Yeah, that's it...That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it!"
